so, today was friday.
orientation at school was lame. it lasted like 40 hours and we didn't even do shit.
okay, so then i went to see Bruno with my boyfriend. it was a great movie. i'm kinda paranoid that something's wrong. he was acting really weird and i didn't know why. and it pisses me off that he can't fucking text me back. jesus. idk. it's hard loving someone with autism. but hey, what kind of relationship doesn't have its ups and downs?
so i'm feeling like i have no life, which is really pathetic considering that i have a great life. my cat's sitting here next to me and i love her. i seriously think horseback riding is... my calling? i've thought that before about other things, but there's nothing unnatural about me+horseback riding. i mean, there's no stronger bond than that of horse and man, right?
i don't know that i'm ready for college. honestly, i don't know. i was really uncomfortable at school today. the people who worked there were nice. but i just didn't make any connections with other students. that's mostly my fault, but you have to cut me some slack. i'm an introverted 16-year-old who's about to be a freshman in college!
should i give up on my dream of making money and just major in something fun like equitation? my heart says yes but my mind says no.
i don't know why i always get in these bloggy moods whenever i'm in a new or unfamiliar situation. i haven't blogged at all in um, a long fucking time. i quit therapy. i've been doing okay, too. good, even. it's like i feel better about myself without having a therapist. i don't know what it is. it's just, i don't want to feel like a psychiatric patient. i feel stronger without a therapist and therefore, i am. i've learned to not let peoples' insults make me go completely insane.
well, i'm going to go try to get some sleep. leave me comments <333
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